09 - BEING SEEN: Common Self-Sabotaging Mistake #1 You Are Making on Social Media

BEING SEEN: Common Self Sabotaging Mistake #1 You Are Making on Social Media and How to Immediately and Easily Fix It & Get Better Forever // Social media Tips // Social media marketing // Being Seen on Social Media

How to Immediately and Easily Fix It & Get Better Forever

Today's episode is the first of a three series podcast on heart-centered social media and the practice of the presence.

This episode is about BEING SEEN on Social Media, and what we commonly and mistakenly do to sabotage ourselves whether knowingly or unknowingly.

The next episode is about BEING HEARD.

The following episode after that is being understood on social media.

And what we do, whether knowingly or unknowingly, that keeps us from being 1000% ourselves in social media - to be wholeheartedly and authentically You - to be the one and only - the original and inspired, guided and vision led YOU!

Now, this is not to say that we let it all hang out on social media.  It does not reflect well on you or your business to pout, scream and complain about such a public platform. But, for many of us - who are heart centered entrepreneurs, as much as we try to promote our business, we seem to not be getting traction, and something might feel off, yet, we can’t put our finger on it.

So what is it that we are doing that is sabotaging our whole intent of being seen heard and understood on our social media platforms?

And all of this: being seen, being heard, being fully understood goes deep. These three needs are The life blood of your success and happiness, both in social media in your business, and life in general.

So - let's take a step back for perspective:

I’ve been practicing yoga for years and even taught yoga a dozen years back on Maui. One of the deepest teachings that I learned from my yoga teacher is the saying, "In yoga as in life." That is, to take what I learn in yoga and apply it to everyday life.

And The practice is to take what Ilearn on the mat and apply it to life off the mat.  To practice the principles of yoga both on and off the mat.  So in vinyasa yoga, which is my practice, I was taught to always take a breath before movement, awareness before action, and even in between poses, to mindful of my intention for the next asana, or pose.  And finally, when I get into a pose, to find myself in a steady seat, so that I am strong in my core and balanced throughout.

Much of what I have mentioned just right there: breathe before movement, awareness before action, mindful intention, having a strong core- all of this applies succinctly to life….

Right down to the principles of alignment.  

On the mat, when we practice alignment, we integrate our muscles and bones in alignment with posture.  This places our body for optimal movement during the various sequences of a yoga practice. The idea of having proper alignment is to provide grounding and support as we flow from asana (posture) to asana (posture).

Off the mat, alignment might mean different things to different people. If I strictly extrapolate the idea of alignment on the mat and take it off the mat into my daily practice, I would consider alignment as being in integrity with body, mind and spirit in all that I say and do.  Being in alignment also means that my outer actions reflect and support my inner motivations so there is congruency.  Alignment means saying what I'm going to do. And doing what I say I will do.

So what does today's topic of being seen on social media have to do with alignment and integrity?  

That’s a MOUTH FULL and a really deep question!

Two things:

  1. Home Base - The stuff that is us:  our inner world of beliefs and values - our spiritual practice - what we believe and hold to be true needs to be in alignment with who we are, and
  2. The expression of who we are (in life, as in social media) needs to be in alignment with the Truth of our being.

Being seen for who we are, what we stand for, and what we're all about, is one of the most core issues of a human existence.

Self-sabotaging mistake #1 that make on social media that keeps us from being seen is that we go at it - posting, connecting and going about - 

Without first seeing ourselves.

If I asked a room full of people to honestly share the root of why they are in therapy, much of the response might come from their need to be seen.  Being seen is a fundamental core need of all children. 

Children who are not seen grow up to be adults that feel invisible - unless of course, there is recovery work, to heal and align that which was not aligned in the 1st place.

The idea of feeling invisible might cause some of us to cope in different ways.  

Some of us might develop protective measures to deliberately not be seen. The walls that we have built are so deeply ingrained that we might not even be aware that we are hiding.

Some of us might have developed the opposite. We might intentionally call attention to ourselves because deep down we may feel that if we do not call attention to ourselves, we will be lost forever. 

Others of us have developed other coping mechanisms to being seen, such to include humor, drama, conflict, and attachments, etc.

Still others, the experience of feeling invisible and not seen may be such an excruciating void for us as a child, that now, as adults, we may have defaulted to hide our Light (who we REALLY are) because it's just easier this way.

Perhaps we've learned that being quiet and not expressing an opinion will help us dodge the criticism that may arise from speaking up with an original thought.

So - this idea of being deeply seen — is to not bring up old childhood wounds, but an observation

That perhaps having an awareness —

To get to the bottom of why we may not feel seen on a public platform like social media -

To get to the bottom of that - We might start looking within - for the answer

I know - that’s a bit deep - especially when we think of social media - and the outward energy of social media…

And here I am insinuating that we look inward.

I know this is NOT the typical social media digital strategist answer - but, I, like you, are not typical people.

The answer and correction to resolving 

Self-sabotaging mistake #1 on social media - the fix to this problem of not feeling seen by others - is to 1st and foremost see yourself.

When I apply the concept of "On the mat, as off the mat" in relation to social media, 

I can see how following the herd of what everyone else is doing is attractive. 

When we follow the herd and do what everybody else is doing, it becomes a self-sabotaging mistake:  we make ourselves like everyone else: invisible!  

When we force ourselves to not be outstanding, the result is NOT OUTSTANDING - we are not truly seen for who we really are.

In doing so, we become miss aligned, and are not as effective as we can be when we are in alignment: body mind and spirit and stay in integrity with who we are (as a soul) and what we've come here to do.

In order to fix this common self-sabotaging mistake # 1 - we must first and foremost be awake. We must be present to ourselves and white bubbles up through the process of living.

Perhaps we do not have a clear vision, and therefore, our actions, directives, and motivations are short-term.

If we really want to resolve our issue -- in order to fix our being seen the problem on social media, we must dig deep.

Here is a heart-to-heart question to ask yourself as you look in the mirror:

Do you realize that your problem of not being seen on social media is a problem that comes back to the heart of hearts to the most important person ever will be in your life: yourself?

How will others see you if you do not see yourself?

For some of us, We have somehow learned to not pay attention to ourselves because we did not get our need for attention met as a child.

And I'm here to say that the time has come to remedy our self-sabotaging mistake number one: we need to see ourselves exactly for who we are, and love this person.

When we apply love to the process of coming out to ourselves, to being seen for who we are and what our souls are meant to do in this lifetime, we change the energy from invisible to magnificent awe. 

There's a beautiful line attributed by Byron Katie who is a lovely spiritual soul an author that reads, "if you realize or how beautiful you are, you would fall at your own feet." I love this because I resonate deeply with this quote! 

Each one of us is a one-of-a-kind, amazing spiritual being, a soul born human to our own individual lives’, with a different set of circumstances, and with a unique soul purpose.

And the fact of the matter is, everyone else is taken. While we are who we are in this lifetime, we've got to be true to ourselves. We got to be in alignment with the whole hearted authenticity of who we've come to be.

So in order to stop repeating our mistakes over and over again leave simply got to come home to ourselves and live in alignment, true to who we are.

You've got to first see ourselves before we expressed or is the show media so other people can see us. If we are not one with the message of our authenticity in social media, something will seem off.

Perhaps people may not be able to verbalize what might be "off."  Or perhaps they simply don't see you as unique, or perhaps they see you totally like everybody else.

In social media as in life, if you are going to leave this one holy precious life, you may as well do it true to your heart-centered self.

Social media is all about transparency. You cannot hide who you are on social media.  You cannot lose when you show up as authentically you.  After all, there is only one, amazing person like you! 

You cannot lose because you only see yourself when you live true to yourself.  You cannot be all things to all people.  When you are front and center for yourself, and you truly see, love and appreciate yourself, you attract the right and perfect people to you. Those who you attract will resonate with you deeply.  They will see you, get to know you and love you. 

If you would like to pause and dive deep, taking some time out for presence, and truly see yourself, please download the free meditation that goes with this podcast.


Subscribe on to The Path of Presence Podcast on Apple iTunes to get new episodes as they become available.


Subscribe on to The Path of Presence Podcast on Apple iTunes to get new episodes as they become available.